The Power of Positive Thinking

The Power of Positive Thinking

For some, thinking of dating as a fun and positive journey is very difficult. There is such power in positive thinking. It can be a game changer. 

As I have said before if you think DATING SUCKS then it will suck for you! It’s a self fulfilling prophesy. The story I share below gives you a glimpse of what I am referring to.

Recently, I met Michael, an attractive younger man that has a promising career and good looks. He inquired about my coaching services and after just a few minutes into the conversation it was glaringly obvious he has a laundry list of roadblocks.

Michael was the perfect “how not to be” poster child. He was a dating disaster and needed a reality check. He was brokenhearted, was full of himself, was gravely unrealistic, and oozed negative energy towards women and dating.

Dating Tip: Don’t speak poorly about those in your dating pool in public with complete strangers

In a room mixed of single men and women Michael openly shared his time tested expertise on dating women he deserved. Like a theatrical performance of a little black book on dating his one man show proclaimed to have met thousands of women and having gone on over a hundred dates in the past year alone. With each word spoken his negative energy poured out.

He turned off every women in the room and the men had mixed feelings. People either wanted to throw him out the window to get rid of his negative energy and save us all from further frustration or duct tape his mouth shut so we didn’t have to hear any more. Some men relished in the fact that he was so negative because it then made the them look amazing with very little effort on their part. All the rest of the men needed was a little positive energy and some humor and they would hit a home run on positive first impressions with these ladies.

Dating Tip: Don’t lie to yourself and think that your negative thoughts will not be picked up by others even if you don’t speak them. People pick up far more what you don’t say then what you do

He was very blunt about with his jaded view on women which would offend most women I know, and if they were not offended at the very least they would think “what an idiot” and at most they would want to push him out the window. When I brought to Michael’s attention his negative energy and attitude in a polite way and encouraged him to make peace with what he was wrestling with for the remainder of the event his response was “I don’t care, I’m not interested in any of these people anyway.”

What he failed to see is that the room was filled with people, men and women, and each of them had a poor first impression of him. Each of these people know single people. We were in a public place, and surrounded by other people who possiblly heard him. He is not afraid to go up and try to talk to women. What if a women he went up to heard him talk? I am sure a complete stranger would have no problem being rude to him. In fact I am guessing most girls would enjoy it.

It was clear Michael, the self proclaimed dating expert was definitely a dating master. He mastered the art of attracting what he put out into the world. He was a mess and his negative attitude was holding him back from any quality women finding him attractive. Sadly, till his attitude changes he will continue to attract the same type of women he is bitter towards, leaving him to struggle longer.

If you find yourself having more of a pessimistic or negative view regarding dating or the people in your dating pool I encourage you to take some time to build a more positive outlook. You may not find yourself being as negative as Michael, however it more than likely is holding you back.

About the Author:

Dating Coach KK, is the leading dating coach in Minneapolis, Minnesota who helps singles not only locally throughout the Twin Cities but also nationally and globally. As a renowned dating coach and professional speaker she brings you practical solutions to the most frustrating dating struggles. Her passion is to assist everyone with achieving the dating life they desire. Contact her today to find out how she can help you. 612.568.3577




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Dating CoachKK, Kimberly Koehler is the leading dating and relationship coach in Minneapolis, MN who helps men and women globally. As a renowned coach and professional speaker I bring you practical and applicable strategies and solutions to the most common dating and relationship struggles. Date smarter, have stronger relationship and join me as we navigate the dating and relationship maze.

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